Helping My Child Manage Emotions During a Pandemic

The coronavirus pandemic has left many families feeling a little overwhelmed by the sudden shift of normalcy. Schools continue to be shut down, and children are battling the new norm of homeschool, being away from friends & families, missing life milestones (e.g., graduation, school events, connecting with others), and being limited in partaking in leisure activities that typically provide independence and stress relief. In addition to the changes in our regular routines, the unprecedented nature of this pandemic has caused widespread panic and fear. 

As a parent, you may have wondered how your child is managing, and how you can help your child emotionally get through this scary and uncertain time. The National Child Traumatic Stress Network states that children are more susceptible to distress when experiencing traumatic events that interrupt their routines. Director of the National Center for Disaster Preparedness at Columbia University in New York City reported that disruptions to daily structure and anxiety around safety can often lead to depression and anxiety in children.    

Regardless of how old your child is, being aware of the potential emotional effects of this outbreak on your child can be helpful in managing current challenges, and mitigating any long-term emotional effects. Being away from friends, feeling restricted, managing a different way of learning, and having limited structure can be difficult for children. 

It’s vital that you keep tabs on your child’s emotional state during the pandemic. Below, I’ll explore anxiety in children & teenage mental health, and share tips on how you can help your children during this time. 

Check-in with your Child Regularly

Approach each conversation with curiosity, openness, honesty, and warmth. Get a gauge about how your child is feeling about this period of time. Let your child know that you are present and available if they have questions. When responding to questions, be mindful of what is appropriate given your child’s age.  When it comes to questions that remain uncertain, don’t be afraid to offer the “I don’t know,” and reassure them that they are safe and cared for. Let them know that you’re here to talk with them about anything that they’re experiencing (e.g. anxiety, frustrations, sadness, & boredom). For more information about how to talk to your children at different developmental ages, click here.

Be Mindful of Signs That Your Child is Struggling Emotionally

Uncertainty and disruptions to routine can lead to challenges in feeling grounding. Continued stress can lead to physical, emotional, and behavioral distress.  Be aware of any physical signs that your child may be experiencing: headaches, tummy aches, digestive problems, nausea, sweating, shakiness, difficulty catching their breath, being on edge, & increased heart rate.

Identify emotional signs of distress: sadness, anxiety, anger, fear, uncertainty, grief, hopelessness, loneliness, overwhelmed, worry, indifference, detachment, & increased irritability.  Some children may experience separation anxiety due to social distancing and struggle with health anxiety. Health anxiety is a fairly common condition in which the patient begins to panic about their personal health. The patient may begin to experience imagined symptoms.  Click here to find out more about anxiety in children.

Look out for behavioral shifts that are out of character for your child. Attend to any changes in sleeping habits/eating, distancing from others, lowered motivation, increased difficulty adhering to the expectations of the household/authority, increased tearfulness, appetite changes, excessive silence, & increase in nightmares. 

These signs represent the difficulties that your child may be having adjusting to this period of time. If you become aware of any of these symptoms, try speaking to your child about what they are experiencing. Be present and emotionally available for your child so that they feel comfortable coming to you when they feel worried or overwhelmed. Hold patience, empathy, validation, and encouragement for what they choose to share. If the problem persists, it may be wise to seek professional help from a therapist.

I provide children’s and teenage mental health support on a virtual platform. Find out about my telehealth services here.

Avoid Watching the News in Front of Them

If your children are struggling with anxiety due to the current situation, try to shield them from constant exposure to news about the epidemic. Continuous news bulletins will only add to your child’s fears and anxieties. Try to put on music or TV shows instead to take your child’s mind off the pandemic.

Organize Virtual Social Play Dates

Social isolation can be difficult for most people. Some of us need social interaction for our emotional well-being. Even though your children aren’t able to visit their friends in person, try to encourage/arrange virtual hangouts with their friends and with your extended family. Encourage your child to do virtual walks, games, and movies with their friends. 

Introduce Mindfulness or Meditation 

Practicing mindfulness can be a wonderful tool during stressful times. Mindful is all about acknowledging the present moment. This type of meditation has been proven to help with children’s mental health issues in a range of cases.

Create a Routine

By establishing a set daily routine, you will bring a sense of stability and purpose back to your child’s life. Try to commit a well-rounded schedule that includes some home learning, exercise, and, of course, some fun. Don’t be too strict when it comes to enforcing this routine. Let your child off the hook if they aren’t feeling up to a busy day. However, do offer them a range of activities to try during the lockdown.

The Takeaway: Focus on Hope, Community, and Positivity

The current situation is difficult for all of us, no matter our age. To keep your family in good spirits, try to keep focusing on the hopeful and positive aspects of life whenever you can. Positivity can be a powerful force for mental wellbeing. Hopefulness is also crucial as it will give your child a sense of a more exciting future. 

Resources

How to Talk to Your Child About the Coronavirus | New York Times

How to talk with your children about difficult topics at any age—from 2-year-olds to teenagers